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How to Give Feedback at Work
In this article I cover some fundamentals of how to give and receive feedback at work so that you can develop personally and professionally. Let’s start with giving feedback. With these four steps you’ll be able to give great feedback that others are more likely to respond to.
1. Be straightforward
- Speak clearly and directly
- Try to be as accurate as possible
- Be specific
- Use concrete examples
- Be honest and genuine
- Never criticize other’s personality or character
- Avoid blaming others
- Don’t use judgemental language or belittle others
- Never give the impression there is only one “right” way to do things
- Avoid the sandwich model
The goal of giving feedback is mainly twofold: either to improve a situation or reinforce desired behaviors. To reach this goal it’s best to be direct. Prepare the recipient for your feedback by gaining their permission to give it. This can be as simple as saying, “Could I give you some feedback about …?” Then deliver the feedback in a straighforward and kind way.
Another tip is not to sandwich critique with praise. This approach often comes across as ingenuine and manipulative. When the other person knows that you have their best interests in mind, they’ll be open to what you have to say.
Recently I gave a colleague feedback, because he made a few careless mistakes in a project. I approached the situation in a straightforward way and said, “I would like to give you some feedback about the file you sent me. Is that okay?” After receiving their “yes” I went on to say something like, “I noticed the following mistakes. I’ve seen your work and know you can do this task much better. In the future just take a little time to double check your work before submitting.” My colleague knows I want him to excel. Therefore, he was thankful for my input.
2. Communicate the behavior’s result and impact
When giving feedback it’s important to point out what impact the other person’s actions had on you. This is what it means to communicate in a way to be understood. Confronting people with the consequences or implications of their behaviors helps them to take responsibility for their actions. Often times people are not aware of how their actions affect others.
For example, I told my colleage that the errors in his file made it more difficult for me to complete my task. And to get everything done as scheduled, I needed to do some overtime. In the future he’ll be more careful, because he wants to produce quality results and doesn’t want to make my life more difficult.
3. Listen to what the other person has to say
It’s important to give the other person the opportunity to respond to your feedback. Hear them out — listen to what they have to say. You probably don’t have all the information or fully know why the other person did what they did. Maybe they understood the task differently or were having a particularly stressful week. Perhaps they’re dealing with something personal. I aksed my colleague how he was doing. It turned out that his schedule was especially tight, because he just came back from vacation and needed to catch up on some work.
This step is extremely important, because people will be more open to your feedback if they feel understood. Feeling understood is crucial for personal and social well-being. It fills a social need that our brain considers essential for safety and survival. In fact feeling understood activates the neural regions of our brain that are associated with reward and social connection (ventral striatum and middle insula). My colleauge and I both felt understood and as a result left the coversation more motivated.
4. Decide on the next steps
Complete the feedback loop by deciding on a course of action. Without this step things probably won’t change too much. Where will you go from here? What will each person do differently? How will you maintain accountability? It’s most effective if you work on a solution together with the other person. Such an approach ultimately reinforces behavioral change, because people tend to commit more to solutions they work on. Make sure each person is clear about the next steps and that you agree on a way to keep each other accountable.
How to Receive Feedback at Work
1. Listen actively
In order to benefit from another person’s feedback its important to understand what they’re saying. Try not to interrupt when the other person is speaking. Even if their delivery is not very tactful, listen beyond any perceived anger or disappointment. There may be something to what they’re saying.
2. Don’t get defensive
It’s easy to get defensive when others point out areas in which you can improve. However, to develop personally and professionally you need feedback. You’ll grow more if you realize that you don’t always have all the answers or do things in the best way. This realization makes you receptive to others’ input and helps you to be flexible regarding how you carry out tasks.
When you feel the urge to defend or justify yourself pause for moment — even if you don’t agree with what’s being said. Make an adjustment inwardly and exercise to not take what the other person is saying personally. Look at the situation as a learning opportunity.
3. Be open
Instead of getting defensive, practice to be open. This means you realize that you can learn something from the other person’s feedback. Furthermore, you take an honest and genuine interest in what they’re saying and are open to adjust your actions if necessary. This kind of openess makes you very approachable. Most people need help in how to give and receive feedback at work. It’s not easy. But no one likes giving feedback to someone who is not receptive. Don’t be that person, because in a way you cut off opportunities for growth. Thank the person for their feedback and welcome more.
4. Inquire
If you don’t understand what the other person is saying ask questions until you gain clarity. The point in asking questions is to better understand what the other person is saying and why they’re saying it. Try to understand the situation from their perspective. For instance you can ask for concrete examples. Such a question ensures that what the other person says is based on facts. This is a great example of how to give and receive feedback at work effectively.
5. Repeat what you understand
Another way to ensure you get what the other person is saying is to repeat what you understand. The other person will then confirm or adjust your statement. Feedback is only helpful if you accurately receive the sender’s message. Additionally, repeating what you understand shows the other person that you take what they’re saying seriously.
6. Respond to the feedback
Feedback can help you see things you wouldn’t normally see, but is only useful if you act on it. Share how you will handle the other person’s feedback. Initially it may be enough to share that you’ll reflect on what they said and consider how to apply it. Depending on the situation you may be able to make some simple adjustments right away. Let the other person know what you will do.
7. If necessary confirm with others
When a person gives you feedback, it doesn’t necessarily mean what they’re saying is accurate. Of course it’s important to be open and listen, but maybe their feedback doesn’t reflect the real situation. At the end of the day, you want to act on feedback that will help you to grow — if necessary ask a few others for their honest view. Do they see things similarly? Be careful to ask in a way that allows the other person to be completely honest.
If you would like to work on how to give and receive feedback at work feel free to reach me here for some 1:1 coaching. I look forward to hearing from you!
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