Everyone faces adversity, but two people can go through the same thing and experience vastly different outcomes. One may barely get by while the other emerges more resilient than ever before. One key to thriving even in the midst of challenges is to maintain an optimistic outlook. This of course begs the question: How do you stay positive?
I am not referring to an unrealistic optimism which causes one to disregard risks and underestimate challenges – it is good to be realisitc.
However, I am talking about learned optimism by which you acknowledge difficulties, but explain them in a way that is more conducive to your development compared to those who are more pessimistic.
Benefits of Optimism
- Higher levels of subjective well-being
- Better physical health
- Better mental health
- Higher motivation
- Longer lifespan
- Better job performance
- Lower levels of stress
- Higher quantity and quality of social relationships
- Better coping skills
- More positive emotions
- Better problem solving skills
How Do You Stay Positive?
1. Change how you view the adversity. This is referred to as cognitive reframing. Instead of allowing the situation to keep you down, consider what can you learn from the adversity. What hidden opportunities are there in this situation?
2. Regularly consider what you are thankful for. Regardless of the situation, there are always things to be grateful for.
3. Know that the adversity is more than likely not permanent. Situations change. Also consider if there is anything you can do to change the situation. What aspects of this situation can you influence?
4. Don’t allow a negative situation in one area to have a negative effect on other areas. This can be difficult. However, you can choose to set a boundary. If you are having a hard time at work, it does not have to ruin your family life.
5. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Show yourself compassion and kindness. If a friend were going through the same situation what would you say to them? How would you support them? Treat yourself in the same way.
6. Think about successes you have had in the past. Such an exercise will help you to feel confident about your ability to reach your goals and change aspects of the situation that you can influence.
7. Challenge and adjust any reoccuring negative thoughts. Beliefs such as “this will never end”, “I can’t get through this” or “I am not good enough” are self-defeating. Ask yourself, “What evidence is contrary to my belief?” and “What is the benefit of thinking this way?”
8. Reach out to someone you can trust. Asking for help and support is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. Being connected to the right people will help you stay positive.
9. Take some time to help and invest in others.
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